Category Archives: Musings

Stepping Out of the Boat: Embracing Change and Trusting the Journey

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Welcome to another week. It’s getting cooler. Autumn will soon be upon us and we’ve celebrated a full year at #Itsnotta Farm! Our second “harvest season” will begin in the surrounding fields and the dust will fly again! We’ll fight with the youngest to make the school bus and enjoy the front porch with warm drinks. We’ve done little, or so it seems, to upgrade or change the property. Sure, we dug some in the gardens and added a few creatures. The pool is no longer green, and you can now count the fish in the pond. However, the walls are the same colour, I still have boxes to unpack. So much junk is still in the barn… but this weekend was a milestone in the “move in process”. We changed the light above our dining room table! The previous light was awful. It was huge and modern looking with spokes and numerous yellow-tinted light bulbs. It looked like a Covid molecule and I hated it from the moment we walked in. I ordered a farm-style inspired chandelier from Amazon the week we moved. It sat in the box in the closet for almost a year.

The “Before” Covid Molecule

I pulled it out of the closet and it sat on the table for another two weeks. We pondered it and perused the very vague instructions with good intentions. Hurray! Finally! This weekend, with the help of capable friends, we climbed the chairs and gathered the hanging chain. Screwed in the bright white light bulbs and voila! Done. I am so happy with it. I have no idea where the thought process was for the other monstrosity came from… brightening the room to sell? The yellow tinge was not the answer. My bright whites are just as nice. And fits the farmhouse. Still… who am I to account for someone else’s style choices?

Change. Little changes, big changes. Change is a constant in our world… we can’t avoid it as time never seems to stop. Insignificant changes like dining room lights. Big choices like moving to the country or marrying the person of your dreams. Careers. Health diagnoses. Treatment choices for things you wish you didn’t need to make choices about. Choices that make you smile. Like getting chickens and watching them run when you call them. I think God gives us choices to keep us active and vibrant. To keep us thinking and growing and adapting and smiling. Change and choices.

Thanks friends for inspiring us to get the job done!

This past Sunday, we were reminded of Matthew 14’s story of Jesus walking on water and asking Peter to come to Him on the waves. Peter had a choice to make… did he trust the “ghost figure” before him and step out of the rocking boat? Or stay where it was “safe”? I think if you have a true encounter with God, your choice is easy. You step out of the boat. You take the risk and move out of your comfort zone into a tumultuous sea and walk above the waves. Meeting the Creator of the Universe gives you the confidence to do this. It’s when we haven’t truly met with Him where choices are hard. Or you’ve asked and prayed and pleaded and you haven’t heard what you wanted to hear.

The After!

Maybe God doesn’t care about what kind of light we hang in the kitchen. Still, I think He is interested in making us happy. And challenging us to ruffle feathers and step our of our little comfort zones once and awhile to truly grow us and grow His kingdom. Change is hard sometimes. They say that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. It at least shapes us a little different when we reach the other side. And He’s there on the water’s edge offering us a helping hand. So, how ’bout it, my friends… are you stepping out of the boat this week? I’m gonna try. I might even tackle hanging some pictures.

Trapped

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I want you to imagine you’re me for a moment. It’s early morning before work. The sun is up, but not quite fully awake, much like your own brain at this hour of the day. It’s time to do morning “farm chores”. Bunny basket is loaded with fresh veggies and fresh water, snacks for the chickens are there too. You’ve made your way through the barn in the dark and loaded up on pellets for the rabbits. Gathering up your stuff, and squeaking in your wet Crocs, you head for the side doorway… there’s no real door, just a passage under the old beams. Just before you make it to the dew laden grass, it smacks you square in the face: a sticky spider web!

If you’re like me, you recoil back, and in disgust, pull the dusty string from your eyelashes and hair, hoping it didn’t get in your mouth or contain its creepy maker, who may be halfway down your t-shirt by now. Now, I don’t have a problem with spiders. They are welcomed here as mosquito eaters and horse fly catchers. They don’t freak me out, in fact, I find the arachnids quite fascinating. You’ll recall how enamoured I was with our garden spider last year (read about it here). Spiders are cool, and neat to watch, but the webs in the barn are strong, sticky and huge! And when you don’t see them and get an eye-full, it is just a little bit unnerving!

In terms of strength to density ratio, a spider silk is 5x stronger than steel. So, although I am able to peel the sticky stuff off my face, the ingenuity of the creature and its trap is surely one for the books. So, let’s muse for a bit. Which side of the web do we wish to be on? Morticia Addams, of the iconic Addams family, once said, “What is normal for the spider, is chaos for the fly.” Perspective is everything. Let’s face it, no one likes to be trapped. Especially if your trapped in something 5x stronger than steel and beady little eyes are staring you down with lunch in mind. Alas, people aren’t often targeted for lunch… but we certainly feel trapped from time to time.

Perhaps it’s a job you hate. Maybe it’s a trying relationship, or a financial struggle you just can’t seem to pull yourself out of. Many suffer from ailments and are in constant pain. It’s hard to help when someone you love is struggling with health or mental illness. Depression can be just as real as broken bones. It’s everywhere. People are so trapped in darkness, that we so often just give up and allow ourselves to be wrapped in the “death cocoon” waiting to be devoured completely. Like the fly, we are stung and paralysed by our own circumstances, rendering ourselves incapable of getting free.

If you’re there, my friend, I encourage you to seek help. We need each other to pull us out of the muck and mire. Call a friend or find guidance in a program or your local church. God is so much bigger than any situation we face, but He uses people to do His good work. Sometimes seeking help is hard though, too. I don’t like to share with others or ask them to pray for me. It’s being vulnerable, and I have to “think it through”, removed from my emotions, to get there. That’s why relationships are worth the effort. It makes the asking easier. Did you know that if a bee gets tangled in a web and returns to her hive, the other bees will surround her and peel the sticky bee free until she is able to spread her wings again? What a picture of what our churches should be like!

And so, we come to another week of pondering life’s little mysteries. As usual, I have little answers to share, but thoughts nonetheless. I try and learn the lessons presented to me as they come, even when it’s being trapped in dusty, icky spider webs in an early morning barn! Welcome to the journey, my beloved. See you again next week!

The Expert Master Gardener: A Reflection on Life and Lavender

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Welcome back to another week of Livin’ the Dream! It’s been a full week of activity… the hubby and I celebrated another wedding anniversary year of not killing each other, and we hosted our friends for a grand gathering and Bar-B-Que at Itsnotta Farm. One of our kids moved into a new place today, and we found a fabulous little nook off the lake to watch sunsets together (aren’t we romantic?) All around, a good time.

On with the muse for this week, though… enough about me. At said Bar-B-Que, I was touring around a friend and showing off my albeit colourful, but disaster of a flower garden. I have a variety of flowers there, but the goldenrod (aka giant ragweed) is about to take over and give my daughter-in-law a severe case of the sneezes. As the friend and I chatted about this and that that I would like to do in the garden, what I want to swap out, what I love etc. etc. it occurred to me how much I really do recognize in the flower world. I know quite a few plants by name and how tall they get, and where they like to be, and when they are in their prime. I’m not sure how I acquired such knowledge over the years… but it’s somewhere in there rattling around in my brain. Huh! I was impressed with even myself.

One of the many varieties of lavender!

Now, I will openly admit, I am certainly not a horticulturist by any stretch of the imagination. I dabble and dig and hope for the best. I know some common plant names, and googled a few, but certainly don’t know the Latin derivatives nor all their uses. I’m learning though. For our anniversary, the hubby and I visited a working lavender farm for a relaxing afternoon. I love lavender, and it’s been on my list for awhile… even though lavender is not in season at the moment, it was fun to walk through the bee loving “bushes”. Did you know there were several varieties of lavender? Buena vista, lavandin, and edelweiss (a white one!) and 450 some odd other varieties! Of lavender alone, people…

Let’s look back at my golden rod mess… golden rod is a “wild flower” … to me, a weed. Along with cosmos, daisies, buttercups and I’m sure you can name a few others. Tiger lilies are also weeds for me… you can’t kill those things! I found out that one of my favourite wild blue flowers (which grows along the road side but never will transplant to my spaces!) is actually a chicory… like the coffee substitute. A lesson I just learned this week. Now just start to let your mind wander a bit to add flowers to your list from mine. What do you know? Roses. Tropical plants, grasses… it goes on and on. And there is a name for every one! I am sure all the gardening books couldn’t put a dent in the list. Let alone the gardener get it all right.

Oh my beloved, do you see the comparison here? Our Master gardener knows not only every tree, flower and blade of grass, but He knows YOU! Every hair on your head, every wrinkle and every scar. He knows your name and why you are here. And He knows all of us. From the beginning of time to the end – God knows us all! I cannot begin to imagine. I have trouble enough keeping my own kids and pets straight… not to mention cousins and extended relatives. Yet, God knows every minute detail about you and me… and cares about it! Like an expert, He tends the hearts of each of us, like a flower farmer tends his rows of lavender. He knows the conditions necessary for us to flourish, and the things that choke us out and cause us not to flower and bloom where we are planted.

I don’t know about you, but this is so encouraging to me. God’s got this. He knows me better than I know myself! Which can be a little frightening, I suppose. Yet, the awesomeness of it, seems to outweigh the fear for me. A deep muse which I don’t understand, but captivates me nonetheless.

So, next time you drive by a field of wildflowers, or pull those “weeds” from your flowerbed, be reminded that there is a Master gardener, who’s got it all figured out!