One comment I often get since we moved out to the country is “Oh, you must be enjoying the peace and quiet so much”. And I am not sure how to answer that. It certainly is quiet. A different kind of quiet. The first few days you could actually “hear” the quiet. You can’t explain it until you’ve experienced it. Like labour pains. We have gotten used to the sound now. Or what people think is quiet. Nature has its own ebb and flow. Cows don’t have a curfew. Crows and jays are early risers. School buses and diesel trucks are not exactly quiet when they travel by. But sure, I’ll give you quiet.

Peaceful. Now there is another muse. What exactly does that mean? I’ve written about peace before. We talk about it. Peace after war. A sense of calm. A thought process to relieve your anxiety. A tranquil moment in nature. People find it on top of a mountain or at some yoga retreat. I think the definition is slightly different for everyone. Maybe it’s different for the same person at different times. Peace. What does it mean for you?

I took this picture the other day at the top of my farmhouse stairs. It was the moment I had been dreaming about. The sun was streaming in through the widow’s balcony (I actually heard the explanation for that yesterday so it’s gonna be my new name for it), and the fluffy, pretty cat was all curled up on the antique chair at the top of the wooden Victorian staircase. A picture of perfect peace.

Or is it? How do you explain a feeling? How do you describe an emotion that may be different for each one of us? How do you capture the thought of an experience that may change depending on where you are in your life journey? Very recently I was chatting with a friend who’s loved one was in the final throws of his servant filled life here on earth. She tells me that they were praying that the Lord would take him so that he would finally be at peace. I’ve heard many prayers for the same thing. An end to suffering. I, too, have called out to God on more than one occasion, questioning why He would let this or that go on for so long? We crave peace. We crave it for ourselves. We crave it for those we love. We even crave it for those we don’t know. We watch the news or hear reports of some cruelty and we cry out for peace. For justice. For an end to suffering.

My kids tease me that I end up blubbering at movies where this emotion is stirred up within me. Usually it’s about a creature. I know, I know, human beings should take on more of a precedence than that faithful dog, but I can somehow explain away the suffering of people. Oh, they did something to deserve it. Oh, they were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Oh, where were their mothers? They likely had a bad upbringing. That cute puppy is innocent though! I’m wrong in my justifications, of course. God did not design suffering. He did design consequences to sin, but they shouldn’t explain away why innocent people have to endure some of the hardships we do. The whole earth is on a collision course with affliction and lack of peace because of the darkness that entered the World with Adam and Eve.

So, yeah, as I sit here with my laptop perched on a straw bale (It’s part of my sad attempt at fall porch decorations) with the dog laying at my feet, I’m tempted to say I am enjoying the peace and quiet. The crisp air is casually swaying the lilac bushes and the crickets are still humming. All too soon though, the “silence” is broken by the call of a noisy blue jay, followed by a school bus rumbling by on its way back from drop offs. The dog barks at it, my writing momentum is broken as my attention shifts and chaos resumes. Our weak and feeble minds don’t hold onto the “peace that passes all understanding” for very long.

I’m comforted to know that the anxieties and worries and the constant brain battles we face were not the original plan. We pray for peace because we know that God in His infinite wisdom made it to be the norm. We crave it and it renews us because He made it part of our being. And it will come again one day when it all gets “reset”. Until then, I promise to share little glimpses of it that I see here on Itsnotta farm and mittonmusings. There will be chaos, crazy, death, destruction and suffering too. Although, I wish you peace this week, my friend. Whatever that looks like for you, I hope you see it and take the time to thank the One who designed it that way. May it calm the mayhem in your brain and give you a glimpse of Heaven. Peace and quiet. Now there’s a concept.